So, I broke up with Facebook...

In a manner disturbingly similar to how breakups often work with real people, I simply cut myself off – cold turkey. Sure, I gave out a warning for a few hours, just in case one of my “friends” needed it, and I emailed this blog address to my actual friends, just in case they wanted to keep up with it in the future. But otherwise, with the click of a button, it was over. Ouch.

If I could explain why in a single statement, “I don’t think this relationship is working for me anymore,” should cover it. Over the past few days, I’ve mentally tracked the pros and cons to my relationship with Facebook, and eventually concluded that said relationship was unhealthy – toxic, really. For example:

-       simple photo sharing
-       keeping up with long-distance friends and relatives easily
-       knowing others’ business (yes, this was a pro – I’m nosy)

-    others’ annoying posts (i.e. political/religious slants, braggy, TMI, etc.)
-    wasting time stalking people I barely know anymore
-    general clique-y-ness formed when show-offs get together and blab their combined awesomeness all over cyberspace
-    knowing there are people on my “friend” list who are not friends and should not know about my daily doings – yet feeling trapped in this “friendship” because de-friending is way too harsh
-    feeling like a bitch because I wouldn’t accept friend requests from everyone
-    finding myself irritated/frustrated DAILY by what other people were doing and saying on FB
-    feeling like a fraud/creeper when I knew personal information (i.e. pregnancies, deaths, drug addictions, break-ups) about people who I haven’t spoken to face-to-face in years
-    realizing that these same people knew/shared personal things about me, too
-    constantly de-tagging myself in photos because I looked like an a-hole in said photos and didn’t want to world to see that (when, in fact, they did, regardless of the de-tagging)
-    knowing that I couldn’t just minimize my time on FB, that I didn’t have the self-control to just leave it alone for a few days; in a sense, I was “addicted”

If the above lists were representative of a real relationship with another person, the immense outweighing of hate over love would certainly inspired me to end it, and the situation was no different with FB. Realizing that there were so many things I wanted to do but couldn’t find time – and then seeing that I was spending hours a day on Facebook – really got me thinking.

For some people, Facebook is an awesome thing. These are people who have figured out how to manage the connection, how to keep Facebook from taking over their lives. I am not one of these people, and the only way for me to take back my life was to stop –


Quitting has been sad…and I am embarrassed to admit it. I’ve felt a bit like there’s a hole in my soul; like there’s a big party happening somewhere and I’m not invited.

But on the flip side, there are so many great things I will have time for now; things that have been horribly neglected during the course of my five-year relationship with Facebook.  Things like blogging, reading, trying new recipes, working out, spending quality time with Morgan, planning our wedding, answering emails, visiting friends – in person. And though my most popular cyberspace outlet is now gone, there are still millions of online distractions with which to engage: Pinterest, Hanson videos, friends’ blogs, cooking websites, NPR, Netflix streaming. And, now when I see an old friend or long-distance acquaintance, the experience will be genuine because that element of mystery will have returned. Maybe my high school reunions will actually feel special now! I’m excited to move on; I’m excited to be free.

Goodbye, Facebook – it really wasn’t you, it was me. But in the end, it was for the best!

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